Two Months Post #4

So I mentioned in my first of the four posts, our #5 had a tongue tie. I asked around lactation consultants on the island and found one dentist who would clip it.  But they wouldn't do it until she was 4 months old!

At this point I was pumping and feeding her to bring her weight up.  It was working amazingly and she was so much more content with a full belly.  Her inability to latch right kept her from getting a full feed, she was working so hard to get the milk out, burning what she was intaking, and thus no weight gain.

So once we found out the prognosis for my FIL after the first week of hospice - the doctors said "weeks" - my husband and I hustled to get plane tickets.  We went back and forth about just sending him or both for a few days. I had the overwhelming feeling I needed to be there.  I didn't know why at the time.  I thought it was just to comfort him.  Turns out, it wasn't just for him.

We also thought we were just going to say goodbye to my FIL so we only scheduled a 3 day trip.

Did I mention Delta Airlines is amazing?

They offer emergency/bereavement fares.  They take 20 percent off (I can't remember, but it dropped the price $50 per ticket) and offer no-charge rescheduling/change.  We scheduled the flights, our wonderful friends volunteered to take care of our children, and we took off two days after we scheduled them.  Obviously, we had to change them later, but there was no charge.  We will be flying Delta more often.  I've been a Southwest devotee for a while, but after this...thank you Delta.

Also, as we got on the flight, I posted this. That following week, for the first time in my life, I felt the prayers of those around us. I can only describe that it felt like our entire posterity and friends were cheering us on and keeping us afloat.

So, after finding out all the tongue tie issues with #5, being really frustrated the doctor on the island wouldn't fix it now, I figured it was a long shot: I was going to see if the pediatric dentist where our family is would fix it, with just few days notice and a patient he'd never seen before.  He only did the clips on Monday - and we were scheduled to leave Monday afternoon.

Obviously, our plans changed on the way there.  The funeral was scheduled for Wednesday, so when the called me Monday morning (I was on "standby"), the doctor was really concerned about flying with what they described as a "very cranky baby" after.  I informed them things had changed and they said if there was a cancellation, they'd call me.

I had faith it could happen, but what is the chance someone would cancel their much needed appointment?

Around 10 am, they called me.  There was a cancellation.  I cried.

As I sat outside (because they don't let parents sit in and watch because they use a laser) during #5's tongue clip, I remember looking toward the ceiling, praying, thanking my Father above, but also my FIL.  I missed him.  I was sad at the fact he never held #5.  I knew that it wasn't coincidence that all the happened - from figuring out her issues, finding a doctor, getting it done, and even his death.

To this day, I feel that our #5 knows him better than all of us.  If you mention his name, her whole face lights up. I knew he loved her. Several people came up to me, who had visited him in hospice, and said the first thing he did was show them photos of the newest grandbaby.  He put it on FB and just raved about her. He may not have seen here alive in person and touched her skin, but that's not important.